Clinton Doctor

One day Clinton goes to the bathroom, pulls down his pants, and much to his amazement, he finds a red ring around his penis. So the next day he goes to his physician and the doctor says, "I can't figure out what it is. So I'll give you some medicine, and if it doesn't work, come back and I'll give you something else."
So Clinton takes the prescription and takes the pills as directed and comes back in 2 weeks. The physician then hands him a different prescription and he comes back in 3 weeks this time. Then, instead of giving him a prescription he gives him a small tube-like capsule.
The doctor says, "Rub this around the offending circle and come back tomorrow. Clinton returns the next day and exclaims, "Wow! That stuff was terrific doc! What was that last concoction? It worked great!"
The doctor calmly replied, "Lipstick remover."

President Sucks Sign

The President was out walking on a beautiful snowy day, when he saw that somebody had urinated on the White House lawn to spell out "The President Sucks." Infuriated, he called on the secret service to figure out who had done it. In a few hours, they came to him and told him that there was some bad news and some worse news. "The bad news is that the urine is from the Vice President." "Al? How could you do this to me? What could be worse than this?" "The handwriting''s the first lady''s."

Hillary's New Gig

Did you hear that NYC paid Hillary Clinton $2,000,000 as a consultant for New Years Eve?
They wanted an expert on dropping the ball at the last second.