How Does A Man Keep His Youth?

Q: How does a man keep his youth?
A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds.

Going to the Movies

For the first time in many years, an old man traveled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn.
Handing the attendant $1.50, he couldn't help but comment, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents."
"Well, sir," the attendant replied with a grin, "You're really going to enjoy yourself. We have sound now."

Easy Specimens

An old man goes to the doctor. The doctor asks for stool, urine, blood, and semen samples. The old man can't believe it. He takes all his little sample jars and goes home. At home, he tells his wife that the doctor wants stool, urine, blood, and semen samples.The wife looks aghast and then realization spreads like the dawn across her wrinkled facial features.
"That's easy," she says, relief obvious in her voice. "All he wants is your pajama pants!"