Satan Knows Best
Struggling to make ends meet on a first-call salary, the pastor was livid when he confronted his wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought. "How could you do this?!" "I was outside the store looking at the dress in the window, and then I found myself trying it on," she explained. "It was like Satan was whispering in my ear, 'You look fabulous in that dress. Buy it!'" "Well," the pastor replied, "You know how I deal with that kind of temptation. I say, 'Get behind me, Satan!'" "I did," replied his wife, "but then he said, 'It looks fabulous from back here, too!'"
Recycled Toilet Paper
Life is good when I can afford to buy recycled toilet paper.
Yo Mama - Robbed
Yo mama so poor, she only gets robbed for practice.
Making Ends Meet
"We have a terrible time making ends meet on Bob's income.", his wife told her best friend. "How do you two manage? And you even have kids!" "We get along okay," her friend said. "You see, we work on our budget every evening. That saves us lots of money." "Really? How can that be?" "Well, by the time we get it all balanced, it's too damn late to go anywhere and do anything!"
Yo Mama - Etch A Sketch
Yo mama so poor, she watches television on an Etch A Sketch.