Where Is Jesus?

A Sunday School teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that he grew up, etc. So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?" Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven." Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart." Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurts out, "I know! I know! He's in our bathroom!" The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds. He finally gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this. And Little Johnny said, "Well, every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?'"

Better than Playing Doctor

Little Johnny was sitting on the bench in the park.  Suzie comes along chomping on her bubblegum. Suzie asked, "You wanna play doctor?" Johnny replied, "NO, that too old fashioned.  Spit out you gum, I wanna play president."

Little Johnny to Tinkle

Little Johnny says to his mother, "Mommy, I have to go and tinkle." The mother replies back, "Would you like Mommy to take you?" Little Johnny says, "No let grandma... her hand shakes!"