Johnny Being Johnny

A young mother paying a visit to a doctor friend and his wife made no attempt to restrain her five-year-old son, who was ransacking an adjoining room. But finally, an extra loud clatter of bottles did prompt her to say, "I hope, doctor, you don't mind Johnny being in there." "No," said the doctor calmly, "He'll be quiet when he gets to the poisons."

Teaching Arithmetic

A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic to Little Johnny. So she said , "If you reached into your right pocket and found a nickel, and you reached into your left pocket and found another one, what would you have?"
"Somebody else's pants," said Little Johnny.

Little Johnny and Geometry

Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'" Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'"