Child Sent to Bed

A small boy is sent to bed by his father...
[Five minutes later] "Da-ad..."
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
[Five minutes later] "Da-aaaad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY... Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"
[Five minutes later] "Daaaa-aaaAAAAD..."
"WHAT??!!"
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"

Teen Bliss

Me and my wife were trying to think of a gift for my son's birthday. "What would you have wanted at 13?" she asked. She wasn't impressed with my reply of "Pornography and a wrist support"
 

Osama's Daughter

Q: What did Osama name his last daughter?
A: Camela - after her mother.