Holiday Jokes - Christmas Jokes

New Year Gym

Today I asked a hot girl at the gym what her new year's resolution was.
She replied fuck you!

So I'm pretty excited about the new year!

Categories: Holiday Jokes (Christmas Jokes)
Anonymous

Sunday School Christmas Lesson

A little boy returned from Sunday school with a new perspective on the Christmas story. He had learned all about the Wise Men from the East who brought gifts to the Baby Jesus. He was so excited he could hardly wait to tell his parents. As soon as he arrived home, he immediately began, "I learned all about the very first Christmas in Sunday school today! There wasn't a Santa Claus way back then, so these three skinny guys on camels had to deliver all the toys! And Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer with his nose so bright wasn't there yet, so they had to have this big spotlight in the sky to find their way around!"

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Jokes about Kids , Holiday Jokes (Christmas Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Jesus Jokes) , Word Play Jokes
Anonymous

Christmas Surprise

My boyfriend doesn't know this, but I put a dollar in an envelope every time I orgasm during sex. That's all I'm spending on him for Christmas.
So far, his roommate is getting an Xbox Series X. He's getting nothing.

Categories: Holiday Jokes (Christmas Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man) , Sex Jokes
Anonymous