Signs And Notices 15

These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.

• Sign in the office of a Roman doctor: "Specialist in women and other diseases."
• Sign in a Tokyo shop: "Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run."
• Sign from a Japanese booklet about using a hotel air CONDITIONER: "COOLERS AND HEATERS: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself."
• Two signs from a Morrocan shop entrance: "English well talking." "Here speeching American."
• Sign at a Budapest zoo: "Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty."
• Sign from a translated sentence from a Russian chess book: "A lot of water has been passed under the bridge since this variation has been played."
• Sign at a garage in Hertfordshire: "Please do not smoke near the pumps. If your life isn't worth anything - gas is!"
• Sign on the menu of a Swiss restaurant: "Our wines leave you nothing to hope for."

Signs and Notices 21

These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.

• At my University's Student center Bathrooms: "If you see four feet instead of two under the bathroom door, please notify it immediately to the University Police."
• In the hallway of a High School in New Jersey "Our School: Commitment, Responsibility, Attitude, Persistance."
• Road sign in Roosevelt, Utah: "Rest Area Next Right" - the next right leads a person right into to a cemetery.
• A sign in the local opportunity shop says, "If your going to steal, then smile for the camera."
• While stopped at an intersection I noticed a man standing on the corner in front of a Burger King. He was holding a sign that read "Will work for food." If he had only looked up, he would have noticed that the Burger King sign directly above him read "Now hiring."
• At an office: "This job is only a test had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, bonuses and promotions."
• Seen on a billboard along a highway: "Caution: Objects in the mirror may have flunked drivers education."

Signs and Notices 05

These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.

• Outside a country shop: "We buy junk and sell antiques."
• In the window of an Oregon store: "Why go elsewhere and be cheated when you can come here?"
• In a Maine restaurant: "Open 7 days a week and weekends."
• In the vestry of a New England church: "Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished."
• In a Pennsylvania cemetery: "Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves."
• On a roller coaster: "Watch your head."
• On the grounds of a public school: "No trespassing without permission."
• On a Tennessee highway: "When this sign is under water, this road is impassable."
• In front of a New Hampshire car wash: "If you can't read this, it's time to wash your car."