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The best jokes and joke writers!

Submarine

Q: How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?

A: Knock on the door.

Blonde Tourists

Two blonde tourists were driving through Wisconsin. As they were approaching Oconomowoc, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch.

As they stood at the counter, one blonde tourist asked the waitress, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are, very slowly?"

The waitress leaned over the counter and said "Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiing."

Mailman Christmas

I'm a mailman. At Christmas this year, blonde Mrs. Jankowitz met me at the door and invited me in for a great breakfast spread. After I ate, I thanked her and she said, "There's more." She took me to her bedroom and showed me moves I had never imagined. I told her I had no idea she felt this way. She said, "I don't." I ask, "So what was all this about?" She says, "I asked the husband what to give the mailman." He said, "Screw the mailman! Breakfast was my idea."

Drinking Code

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead walked into a bar.

The brunette said to the bartender "I'll have a B and C."

"What's a B and C?" asked the bartender.

"Bourbon and Coke," replied the brunette.

"I'll have a G and T," said the red head.

"What's a G and T?" asked the bartender.

"Gin and tonic." replied the red head.

"I'll have a15," said the blonde.

"What's a 15?" asked the bartender.

The blonde rolled her eyes and said,"Duh, a 7 and 7."

Blonde Burned

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car?

A: She burned her lips on the tailpipe.