Elephant And Snail

Q: What is stronger an elephant or a snail?
A: A snail, because it carries it's house, an elephant just carries its trunk!

Daddy Longlegs

Little Lucy was playing in the garden when she spotted two spiders mating. "Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?"
"They're mating, Lucy" he replied.
"What do you call the spider on top Daddy?" Lucy asked.
"Oh, that's a Daddy Longlegs."
Lucy asked, "Oh, so one's a Daddy Longlegs and the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?"
Daddy replied, "No, both of them are Daddy Longlegs."
Lucy thought for a moment, then took her foot and stamped them flat. "Well, we're not having THAT sort of thing in our garden!!"

Inside Out

Q: Why did the gorilla jump off the building?
A: He wanted to show what kind of stuff he was made of.