We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

The best jokes and joke writers!

Kindle App

There should be an app called "Smoke" that is only available on the Kindle Fire.

Modems vs Women

Some reasons why a modem is better than a woman:

  1. A modem doesn't ask for a commitment if you use it.
  2. Getting a modem to obey you is as simple as typing "AT".
  3. When you're done using your modem, you can roll over and go to sleep without feeling guilty.
  4. A modem won't say a word if you come home late.
  5. A modem can't collect alimony if you decide to dump it.
  6. A modem will always wait patiently by the phone.
  7. You can always get a few bucks for an old modem when a faster model comes out.
  8. A modem doesn't mind if you call another modem.
  9. A virus you catch from your modem doesn't require a trip to the doctor.
  10. You don't have to bring a modem home to meet your parents.
  11. If an error occurs, Abort, Retry or Fail are the only options you have to worry about.
  12. Modems come with an instruction manual.
  13. Modems have a volume control - you can even turn the sound OFF.

Star Wars Convention

Hey, could you tell me where the Star Wars convention is? I just got lost... in your eyes.

Find Me

I'm naming my TV remote Waldo for obvious reasons.


Q: What did Elon Musk call Boeing's Starliner's latest malfunction?

A: Projectile dysfunction.