U.S. State Jokes - Ohio Jokes

Four Big Ten Alumni

Four college alumni were climbing a mountain one day. Each was from a different Big Ten school and each proclaimed to be the most loyal of all fans at their Alma mater. As they climbed higher, they argued as to which one of them was the most loyal of all. They continued to argue all the way up the mountain, and finally as they reached the top, the Boilermaker hurled himself off the mountain, shouting, "This is for Purdue!" as he fell to his doom.
Not wanting to be out done, the Wildcat threw himself off the mountain proclaiming, "This is for Northwestern!" Seeing this, the Buckeye walked over and shouted, "This is for everyone!!!" and pushed the Wolverine off the side of the mountain.

Anonymous

Kentucky Redneck and Ohio Buckeye

A Kentucky redneck and an Ohio buckeye are night fishing on their respective sides of the Ohio River. As soon as the redneck puts his line in the water, he slings a fish onto the bank. The buckeye isn't catching anything, so he yells across to the redneck, "Buddy, I'd sure like to be on your side of the river!" "Alright, tell ya what -- I'll shine my flashlight 'cross this river, and you can walk across this little beam of light!" the redneck yells back. The buckeye replies, "Ain't no way, buddy. You must think I'm a fool. I know when I get halfway 'cross, you'll turn your flashlight off!"

Anonymous

Ohio Crazy Law

  • It is illegal to mistreat anything of great importance.
  • Owners of tigers must notify authorities within one hour if the tiger escapes. 
  • It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
  • Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
  • It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
  • The Ohio driver's education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car.
  • No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July.
  • Participating or conducting a duel is prohibited.
  • Breast feeding is not allowed in public.
  • In Ohio, if you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker's stand, you can be fined $25.00.
  • It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
  • Bay Village It is illegal to walk a cow down Lake Road.
  • Bexley Ordinance number 223, of 09/09/19 prohibits the installation and usage of slot machines in outhouses.
  • Clinton County Any person who leans against a public building will be subject to fines.
  • Cleveland It's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license!
  • Women are forbidden from wearing patent leather shoes, lest men see reflections of their underwear.
  • Columbus It is illegal for stores to sell corn flakes on Sunday.
  • Fairview Park It's against the law to honk your horn "excessively". A grandmother was fined for honking her horn twice at her neighbor.
  • Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was fined for removing an item from a tree lawn even though he had the owner's permission.
  • Ironton Cross-dressing is against the law.
  • Lima Any map that does not have Lima clearly stated on the map cannot be sold.
  • Lowell It is unlawful to run a horse over five miles per hour.
  • Marion You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.
  • North Canton It is against the law to roller skate without notifying the police.
  • McDonald Your goose may not paraded down Main Street.
  • Oxford It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
  • Paulding A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.
  • Toledo Throwing a snake at anyone is illegal.
  • Strongsville Catch 22 is banned.
  • Youngstown Riding on the roof of a taxi cab is not allowed.
  • You may not run out of gas.

Anonymous