Red Fire Engine

There are four wheels and eight men on a fire engine. Four and eight makes 12. There are 12 inches in a ruler. Queen Elizabeth is a ruler. The Queen Elizabeth was a ship. Ships sail in the sea. The sea has fish. Fish have fins. The Finns are always fighting the Russians. Russians are known as "red". Fire engines are always rushin', and that's why they're red.

Appreciate Flutes

Q: Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?
A: To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Irresistible to Women

Q: What are six inches long and irresistible to women?
A: Dollar bills.