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Relationship Jokes - Dating Jokes

Ex-Girlfriend
Sometimes I wonder about my ex girlfriends who I haven't seen in years. Has she become all fat and bloated, or has she become disgustingly skinny; or maybe someone has already found the body.
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Anonymous
Smart Phone Trouble
My girlfriend texted me "helpmyspacebarbrokecanyoucomeoverandgivemeanalternative"
Anybody know what "ternative" means?
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Anonymous
Samples Needed
My boyfriend said that for his physical, the doctor needed a urine specimen, a stool sample, and a semen specimen. I told him, "Just give them your underwear."
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Anonymous