Racist Jokes - Black Jokes
Hubby in Heaven
Q: What do you call an African-American lady whose spouse just died?
A: A black widow.
St. Patrick's Day
What's the difference between St. Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day? On St. Patrick's Day everyone wishes they were Irish.
This black guy is walking along a beach when he looks down a sees an antique lamp. Thinking that he'll get enough money for another vial of crack, he takes the lamp home and starts to clean it. He starts rubbing the lamp, when all of a sudden a Jewish genie appears, and being a Jewish genie, he say's to the black man that he has two wishes. The black guy thinks for a couple of seconds, and quickly says:, "I want to be white and surrounded by cunt. "In an instant he is turned into a tampon. Now the morale of this story is: Don't ever expect anything from a Jew without strings attached.
Looking for a Monkey Wrench
An old farmer is driving down a country road in his pickup truck when it starts making an awful noise. He stops the truck and crawls underneath to investigate the problem."Hmmm...muffler's loose. I bet I could fix that if I had a Monkey Wrench." He says. He crawls out from underneath the truck and looks down the road. Off in the distance he sees a small house. There is a black woman and several small black children playing in the yard. The Farmer yells to her, "Hey Miss, do you happen to have a Monkey Wrench?" "What?" She yells back. "A Monkey Wrench!!?" He screams."What?" "MONKEY WRENCH!!?...MONKEY WRENCH!!?" "Naw, this ain't no Monkey Ranch, its a Day Care Center!"
What to Wear
Three large black ladies were getting ready to take a plane trip for the very first time. The first lady said, "I don't know bout y'all, but I'm gunna put me on sum hot pink panties beefo' I gets on dat plane." "Why you gonna wear dem fo?" the other two asked. The first replied, "Cause, if dat plane goes down and I'm out dare laying butt-up in a conefield, dey gonna find me first."
The second lady said, "Well, then I'm a-gonna wear me some Floe resant orange panties." "Why you gonna wear dem?" the others asked. The second lady answered, "Cause if dis hare plane is goin' down and I be floating butt-up in the oshun, dey can see me first."
The third lady says, "Well, I aint gonna wear no panties." "What No panties?" the others asked in disbelief. " Dat's right girlfriends, you hears me right. I ain't wearing no panties cos, honey, dey always look for da black box first."