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There's a nickels worth of difference between a republican and a democrat. Put a nickel on the table and a republican will kill you for it. Do the same and a democrat will steal it from you.
A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. The republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person. The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, He decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republicans pocket and gave him fifty dollars.