Saddam Hussein and Bill Clinton

Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, "Bill, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautiful country, and on each house I saw a banner." "What did it say on the banners?" Clinton asks. Saddam replies, "Allah is god, god is Allah."
Clinton says, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever.  It had been rebuilt completely and on each house flew an enormous banner."  "What could you see on the banners?" Saddam asks. Clinton replies, "I don't know. I can't read Hebrew."

Weapons of Mass Destruction

A reporter heard Bush and one of his underlings talking in the hallway: "Mr President, how do we know for sure Iraq has weapons of mass destruction?"
Pres says: "You think we're stupid boy??? We made copies of all the receipts!!"

Republicans In Heaven

Q: Why are there only 12 Republicans in heaven?
A: If there were any more, it'd be hell.