Little Johnny / Suzie Jokes

Little Johnny catches his parents going at it. He yells in, "Hey, Pop! What are you doing?" His father says, "Son, I'm filling your mother's tank." Johnny says, "Oh, yeah? Well, you better get a model that gets better mileage. The postman filled her this morning."

Little Johnny's is coming home from the store swinging the loaf of bread in one hand and the other hand in his pants pocket.

Along came Priest Joe, who thought to himself "This is a good opportunity to quote from the bible to Little Johnny."

He walked up to Little Johnny and said "Little Johnny, I see that you have the Staff of Life in your hand. What do you have in the other?"

Little Johnny replied, "A loaf of bread Father."

The teacher hears Little Johnny cussing, and gets pissed off. She goes bitching to Little Johnny's father. She comes to Little Johnny's house and sees Little Johnny fucking a goat in the front yard. She walks in the house and screams to his father, "Your son! Your son! He cussed in the school and now... now he's being carnal with a goat in the front yard!" Little Johnny's father goes running out the door yelling, "Son of a bitch! Today is my turn!"

A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her Grade 6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class. She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Pat?"

"Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters."

"Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't want to see you for three days." The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment, she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks, "What's so funny, Billy?"

"Well miss, I just saw both of your garters." Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe; "I don't want to see you for three weeks."

Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser when she turns around again, so she bends over to pick it up. This time there is a burst of laughter from another male student. She quickly turns to see Little Johnny leaving the classroom. "Where do you think you are going?" she asks.

"Well teacher, from what I just saw, my school days are over!"

Little Johnny is passing his parents bedroom in the middle of the night, in search of a glass of water. Hearing a lot of moaning and thumping, he peeks in and catches his folks in the Act.

Before dad can even react, Little Johnny exclaims, "Oh boy! Horsie ride! Daddy can I ride on your back?" Daddy was relieved that Johnny's not asking more uncomfortable questions, and seeing the opportunity not to break his stride, he agrees.

Johnny hops on and daddy starts going to town. Pretty soon mommy starts moaning and gasping. Johnny cries out, "Hang on tight, Daddy! This is the part where me and the milkman usually gets bucked off!"