Lawyer and Mexican

A lawyer and a Mexican live next to each other in the most cookie-cutter neighborhood you can imagine. One day, they're both mowing the front lawn. The Mexican says, "You know, my house is worth more than yours."
The lawyer is confused. He responds, "How? Our houses are identical. Did you renovate the interior?" "No." "Did you modernize the kitchen or the bathroom?" "I didn't." "Then how can your house be worth more than mine?" the lawyer cries.
"Well, I live next to a lawyer, and you live next to a Mexican."

Mexican Rubber

Q: What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe?
A: Roberto!

Mexican/American War

During the Mexican/American war, an intense long standoff occurred along the front. For days and days neither side made any advances. Finally, an American general had a bright idea. He aimed his rifle to the Mexican trenches and yelled "Hey Juan!"  A soldier jumped up and replied, "What?" The general shot him dead. This continued for three days. A Mexican general decided that two could play this game and decided to try it out. He called out, "Hey John!!"  An American replied, "John isn't here......is that you Juan?" The Mexican general stood up, "Yeah?!".....