Disease / Afflictions Jokes - Menstruation / PMS Jokes

One day a woman went to her pastor and asked, "Pastor there are some things in life that aren't addressed in the Bible; how are we supposed to deal with them?  The Pastor responded, "There are no such things, give me an example of what you are talking about".  The woman responded, "PMS is not in the Bible". So the Pastor thought and told the woman to call back in the morning and he would have the answer.  The woman called the next morning and asked if the Pastor had an answer about PMS in the Bible.  The Pastor replied, "Yes, it's the part where Mary rides Joseph's ass all the way to Bethlehem!!!".

One day Little Sally got her "monthly bleeding" for the first time in her life. Having failed to understand what was going on and being really frightened, she decided to share her trouble with little Joey. When she found Joey she told him what was happening, but he didn't quite understand so she showed him what her problem was. Joey's face got very serious and he said, "You know, I'm no doctor, but it looks like someone ripped your balls off!"

PMS jokes are not funny... Period!

A pharmacist tells his new young clerk, "When a customer comes into the shop, be very polite to them and try to put a little poetry into it when you're talking to them."  The youth says that he does not see what the pharmacist means by this, so the pharmacist says that he should observe when the next customer comes in and watch how he or she is dealt with.  Presently a middle aged woman comes in to the shop and asks for something for a tummy bug. The pharmacist says, "There's a lot of that virus going about, but this pink mixture should sort you out!"  "Oh thank you very much!" says the middle aged woman and she leaves the shop.  So the pharmacist says the youth can serve the next customer while he goes to tea break. "And remember to put some poetry into it," he says. The youth waits around and nobody comes in, so he decides to go to the restroom.  Just as he's about to head off, a young teenage girl comes in. "Can I help you?" he asks. She replies very embarrassedly that she would like to buy some sanitary napkins, to which the youth replies, "Hang on there Miss, I'm dying for a piss, but I'll be back in a flash, with a sash for your gash!"

A young man got a new job running the register at a store. The old store owner said he would teach him how to up-sell. "Watch how I do it," he said to the new hire. As a customer put a bag of grass seed on the counter, the old-timer said to him, "When you plant those seeds and the grass starts growing, you're going to need a new lawnmower to cut the grass." "You know," said the man, "I do need a new mower. Sure, I'll take one." After the customer left, the new kid said, "I think I see what you mean. Let me handle this next one." A customer stepped up to the counter and set down a box of tampons. The young salesman said, "You know, you should get you a new lawnmower to go with that." The man asked the young salesman, "What are you talking about?" "It looks like your weekend's shot so you might as well cut the grass."