For 40 years

Two neighbors had been fighting each other for  four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. After about a year and a half of Bob's cow crapping in Bill's yard; being ignored all the while, a semi pulls up in front of Bill's house. Bob runs over and demands to know what's in the18-wheeler. 'My new pet elephant,' Bill replies solemnly.

Basketball

Q: How are elephants and hippopotamuses alike?
A: Neither can play basketball!

Good Deal

A man was sprinkling some white powder on his lawn. "Why are you doing that?" asked his neighbor "It's to keep the elephants off the grass" he replied. "But we don't get elephants around here!" "I know good stuff isn't it?"