Sports Entrance Exam

UNIVERSITY ENTRANCE EXAM SEC FOOTBALL PLAYER VERSION
(Time Limit: 3 Weeks)

1. What language is spoken in France?
2. Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions -OR- give the first name of Pierre Trudeau.
3. Would you ask William Shakespeare to:
   (a) build a bridge
   (b) sail the ocean
   (c) lead an army or
   (d) WRITE A PLAY
4. What religion is the Pope?
   (a) Jewish
   (b) Catholic
   (c) Hindu
   (d) Polish
   (e) Agnostic
5. Metric conversion. How many feet is 0.0 meters?
6. What time is it when the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 5?
7. How many commandments was Moses given? (approximately)
8. What are people in America's far north called?
   (a) Westerners
   (b) Southerners
   (c) Northerners
9. Spell -- Bush, Carter and Clinton
10. Six kings of England have been called George, the last one being George the Sixth. Name the previous five.
11. Where does rain come from?
    (a) Macy's
    (b) a 7-11
    (c) Canada
    (d) the sky
12. Can you explain Einstein's Theory of Relativity?
    (a) yes
    (b) no
13. What are coat hangers used for?
14. The Star Spangled Banner is the National Anthem for what country?
15. Explain Le Chatelier's Principle of Dynamic Equilibrium -OR- spell your name in BLOCK LETTERS.
16. Where is the basement in a three story building located?
17. Which part of America produces the most oranges?
    (a) New York
    (b) Florida
    (c) Canada
    (d) Wisconsin
18. Advanced math. If you have three apples how many apples do you have?
19. What does NBC (National Broadcasting Corp.) stand for?
    *You must answer three or more questions correctly to qualify*

American Footballers to Change Lightbulb

Q: How many American footballers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two - one to screw it in and the other to recover the fumble.

Dallas Cowboy Put - Downs

Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around a TV watching the Playoffs?
A: The Dallas Cowboys
Q: How many players did the Cowboys dress for their last game?
A: 22. The rest dressed themselves.
Q: What's Jerry Jones' biggest concern?
A: Does bail money count against the salary cap?
Q: Four Dallas Cowboys are in a car. Who's driving?
A: The police.
I understand Chicago is trying to sign Michael Irvin. They got rid of the refrigerator and now they want a coke machine.
The Dallas newspapers reported yesterday that Texas Stadium is going to take out the artificial turf because the Cowboys play better on "grass".
The Dallas Cowboys adopted a new "Honor System". Yes, your Honor, No, your Honor.
The Cowboys had a 8 and 8 season this year. 8 arrests, 8 convictions.
Q: What's the difference between a Cowboys fan and a baby?
A: Eventually the baby stops whining.
A woman in Dallas calls911. When the officer answers the phone the woman is hysterical and tells the cop that a man has just broken into her home and she thinks he intends to rape her. The officer explain that they are just extremely busy at the moment and tells her "Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you."