School Jokes - Others

A Sunday school teacher was giving her class the assignment for the next week. "Next Sunday," she said, "we are going to talk about liars, and in preparation for the lesson, I want you all to read the Seventeenth Chapter of Mark." The following week at the beginning of the class, the teacher said, "Now all who have prepared for today's lesson by reading the Seventeenth Chapter of Mark, please come to the front." Half the class stood up and came forward. "The rest of you may leave," said the teacher, "these students are the ones I want to talk speak to. There is no Seventeenth Chapter in the Book of Mark!"

Q: How do you get a parrot to talk properly?

A: Send him to polytechnic!

Teacher: "Name six wild animals."

Pupil: "Four elephants and two lions!"

One day Adam's teacher told the class that everyone must find out a moral for the next day's class. One boy came in and said, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch." The second boy said, "Don't judge a book by it's cover." Then Adam came in with a broken jaw and black eyes and said, "I asked my Uncle Johnny for a moral and he told me to shut up. I told him he had to help me because it was homework." The teacher said, "What is the moral, Johnny?" "DON''T MESS WITH UNCLE JOHNNY WHEN HE'S DRINKING!!!''

Real Answers From Earth Science Exams

• The terrestrial planets are much larger than the gas giants.
• Wegener found matching bedbugs on opposite sides of the Atlantic.
• The main problem associated with limestone aquifers is Lyme disease.
• We don't have rock salt on Guam because that forms from from evaporation of oceans and we don't have oceans on Guam.
• Erie, Pennsylvania has no volcanoes because it's too cold there.
• The most important agent of landscape formation on Guam is greyhounds - they are intelligent.
• We know that the sun is much farther away from us than the moon is, because we can see stars between us and the sun, but not between us and the moon.
• The rear end of a trilobite is called a trilobutt.