How Much Of The Stack

"And how much of that stack of hay did you steal, Kavanaugh?" the priest asked at confession. "I might as well confess to the whole stack, your Reverence," said Kavanaugh. "I'm goin' after the rest of it tonight!"

Hot Dog

Two nuns from Ireland come to tour New York City. Before they come, they hear that Americans eat dogs, so they both agree to try it when they arrive. As they're walking around New York, they hear, "Hot Dogs! Get your hot dogs!" They rush over to get one! As the first nun opens hers, her face turns white and she gasps, "What part did you get?!"

Help Needed!

A man running through the crowded train looked very agitated, calling out, "Is there a Catholic Priest on board?!" When he got no reply, he ran back up the train shouting, "Is there an Anglican Priest on board?!" Still there was no reply. Now becoming very desperate, he ran down the train shouting, "Is there a Rabbi on board?" Finally, a passenger jumped up and shouted, "Can I be of any assistance, my friend?!! I'm a Charismatic Pastor!!" The agitated man paused, looked at him and said, "Sit down; you can't help me. I need a corkscrew!"