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The best jokes and joke writers!

Anything But

A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender asks the seal, "What's your pleasure?" The seal replies, "Anything but Canadian Club."

Bear In A Bar

A bear walked into a bar and said to the bartender, "I'll have a pint of beer and a .............................. packet of peanuts."

The bartender said, "Why the big paws?"

Harambe at MadTree

Harambe and a friend walk into the taproom at MadTree Brewing in Cincinnati. After quite a few drinks, Harambe asks for a final mug of Happy Amber, his favorite brew. His friend says, "Dude, you've had too much today. Just get some ice to suck on for a while until we leave." Harambe nods his agreement, and the bartender says, "So, just ice?"

His friend says, "Yep, just ice for Harambe."