Your Repertoire.

Jacques Thibault, the violinist, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while in the green room after a concert. "There's not much room on this page," he said. "What shall I write?" Another violinist, standing by, offered the following helpful hint, "Write your repertoire."

Conductors Change a Bulb

Q: How many conductors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Seven. [Indignant nose upturning] Of course, I wouldn't expect you to understand.

Bagpiper And Lightning

Q: Why are bagpipers fingers like lightning?
A: They rarely strike the same spot twice.