Telephone Jokes - Answering Machine Jokes

Answering Machine - Lost Phone

Hello. I'm home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it. 

Anonymous

Answering Machine - Pledge

Hi, this is Jim. Thanks for calling during my spring pledge drive. A basic membership is only $30, and a $60 pledge gets you an "I love Jim Shea" T-shirt. Please wait for the tone, and thank you for your pledge.

Anonymous

Answering Machine - Anything For Love

Meat Loaf's "I'd Do Anything For Love": And I would do anything for calls, I promise I will call you back; I would do anything for calls, But I can't talk right now and that's a fact. I'm not home right now, so I just can't answer the phone, No way, But I would do anything for calls, Oh, I would do anything for calls! Just let me know who it was who called, And I'll call you back! Yes, I'll call you back! Just leave a message at the tone, I'll hear it when I get back home, And I will call -- you -- back! 

Anonymous