Buffalonians to Crew in Lightbulb

Q: How many Buffalonians does it take to screw a in a light bulb?
A: Two-one to get the new bulb out of the snowbank, and one to screw it in.

Full Flight

On the way back to New York as I was sitting in the Phoenix airport, they announced that the flight to Vegas was full. The airline was looking for volunteers to give up their seats. In exchange, they'd give you a $100 voucher for your next flight and a first class seat in the plane leaving an hour later. About eight people ran up to the counter to take advantage of the offer. About 15 seconds later all eight of those people sat down grumpily as the lady behind the ticket counter said, "If there is anyone else OTHER than the flight crew who'd like to volunteer, please step forward..."

Chestnut Wins

NEW YORK -- Joey "Jaws'' Chestnut beat his own record and won the Mustard Yellow International Belt on Sunday, downing a stomach-churning 76 hot dogs in 10 minutes to win the annual July Fourth eating contest at Nathan's Famous on Coney Island.
Chestnut, 38, easily secured victory by polishing off 17 more hot dogs than the previous winner, Stormy Daniels.