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The best jokes and joke writers!

Wedding Tradition

A little boy at a wedding, looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?" His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she's happy and this is the happiest day of her life." The boy thinks about this, and then says, "Well then, why is the boy wearing black?"

Wedding Music

Q: What music is recommended for the wedding ceremony?

A: Anything except "Tied to the Whipping Post."

Return Your Keys

For some wedding reception fun, try this. Distribute fifteen blank keys to male friends of the bride-to-be and two more blank keys to a guy and a very old lady. Then, during the reception, while people are making toasts, announce to everyone that since the bride is no longer available, any guy with a key to her apartment should turn it in at the tray that has been set up, whereby the fifteen pre-selected men would walk up and turn in their keys and make the same announcement for the groom, whereby both the old lady and the other guy would both walk up with their key.

Wedding Questions and Answers

Q: Is it all right to bring a date to the wedding?

A: Not if you are the groom.

 

 Q: How many showers is the bride supposed to have?

 A: At least one within a week of the wedding.

 

Q: What music is recommended for the wedding ceremony? 

A: Anything except "Tied to the Whipping Post".

Return Your Keys

Before a friend's wedding reception, we passed out keys (blanks) to several girls and one guy. Before some toasts were made, the best man said to the guests, "Now that Jim is married and is no longer available, it is probably a good idea to have any of you girls out there with a key to his apartment to please turn it in now." Then the pre-selected girls (about thirty of them) slowly walked up and handed in their keys as they made bedroom eyes at him and flirted a bit; some of the girls would turn in not just one key, but six or seven of them. Then the guy walked up, turned in the key, and kissed the groom on the cheek. It's probably not original, but it worked pretty well.