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Ads & Newspapers
Signs and Notices 21
These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.
- At my University's Student center Bathrooms: "If you see four feet instead of two under the bathroom door, please notify it immediately to the University Police."
- In the hallway of a High School in New Jersey "Our School: Commitment, Responsibility, Attitude, Persistance."
- Road sign in Roosevelt, Utah: "Rest Area Next Right" - the next right leads a person right into to a cemetery.
- A sign in the local opportunity shop says, "If your going to steal, then smile for the camera."
- While stopped at an intersection I noticed a man standing on the corner in front of a Burger King. He was holding a sign that read "Will work for food." If he had only looked up, he would have noticed that the Burger King sign directly above him read "Now hiring."
- At an office: "This job is only a test had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, bonuses and promotions."
- Seen on a billboard along a highway: "Caution: Objects in the mirror may have flunked drivers education."
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Ads & Newspapers
(Signs and Notices)
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Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
Want Ads
- Illiterate? Write today for free help.
- Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.
- Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
- Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children
- Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
- Stock up and save. Limit: one.
- Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale
- 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.
- Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
- Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
- Dinner Special -- Turkey $2. 35; Chicken or Beef $2. 25; Children = $2.00
- For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
- Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
- We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
- For sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. Great Dames for sale.
- Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
- Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it.
- Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts. Zap does the job in 24 hours.
- Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
- For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
- Man, honest. Will take anything.
- Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first.
- Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
- Wanted: Hair cutter. Excellent growth potential.
- Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
- Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
- Wanted. Widower with school age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
- And now, the Superstore-unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
- We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.30. Free Beer!!. Tomorrow!
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Ads & Newspapers
(Classifieds)
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Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
Credit Card Commercial That Never Was
Cover Charge: $15.00
Round of Drinks: $23.00
Table Dance: $30.00
Another Round of Drinks: $23.00
Couch Dance and Tips: $50.00
A Round of Shots: $34.00
Another Round of Drinks: $23.00
Lap Dance and Hand Job: $100.00
Private Dance and Hotel Room: $500.00
Sending her on her way without having to cuddle or listen to her, PRICELESS!
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Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous