We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).


The best jokes and joke writers!

Bump

Mr. Horntoot admitted to his wife that he was feeling much better since his operation, but couldn't account for the enormous bump on the back of his head. "Oh, that?" chuckled Mrs. Horntoot. "Just before your operation they suddenly ran out of ether!"

Knockout Decisions

Before my surgery, my anesthetist offered to knock me out with either gas or a boat paddle.

It was an ether/oar situation

Definition of an Anesthesiologist

An anesthesiologist is a doctor who works in the operating room to delay your pain until such time as you get their bill for services.

The Medical Convention

At a medical convention, a male doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other. The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts. As they sit down at the restaurant, she excuses herself to go and wash her hands. After dinner, one thing leads to another and they end up in her hotel bedroom. Just as things get hot, the female doc interrupts and says she has to go and wash her hands. Once she comes back, they go for it. After the sex session, she gets up and says she is going to wash her hands. As she comes back the male doc says, "I bet you are a surgeon." She confirms, and asks how he knew. "Easy, he said, you're always washing your hands." "That's very clever!" she says, "I bet you're an anesthesiologist." "Wow, how did you guess?" he asked. "I didn't feel a thing!" she replied.