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Sex Jokes
Light Bulbs For Dinner
Little Freddie said to Little Johnny, "My dad's tougher than your dad!" "Oh yeah?" said Little Johnny, "My dad is so tough, he has light bulbs for dinner!" "Really?" "Yeah, the other night I heard him tell my mom, 'Turn out the light, I wanna eat it!"
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Giovanni and Lothario
It is Renaissance Italy and Lothario and his friend Giovanni sit at a table outside a cafe in Venice. Lothario enjoys his coffee while Giovanni, obviously depressed, sits staring into his. Lothario notices that Giovanni is upset and asks, "Giovanni, why are you so depressed?" Giovanni looks at him and says, "Lothario, you see this canal we sit beside, this beautiful Venician canal? I Giovanni designed and built this canal. Do they call me Giovanni the canal builder? No they do not." Giovanni points to a bridge a short way from the cafe. "You see that bridge Lothario? I, Giovanni, designed and built that beautiful bridge and many others like it, but do they call me Giovanni the bridge builder? No they do not" Giovanni then gestures at the buildings that surround them "These houses, these beautiful houses of Venice. I, Giovanni designed and built these houses and do they call me Giovanni the house builder? No they do not. But I screw one sheep..."
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Bus Ride
An old maid wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery with the remains of her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver, I have a dead pussy. The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and said, "Sit with my wife. You two have a lot in common.
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