Work & Office Jokes - Others

A man comes home from the office and tells his wife he had a frustrating day at work. "Ahhhhh, tell me all about your day honey," his wife says. The husband looks at her and says, "Well... I just did."

Software Development Process

1. Order the T-shirts for the Development team
2. Announce availability
3. Write the code
4. Write the manual
5. Hire a Product Manager
6. Spec the software (writing the specs after the code helps to ensure that the software meets the specifications)
7. Ship
8. Test (the customers are a big help here)
9. Identify bugs as potential enhancements
10. Announce the upgrade program

Telegram received from ex-employee: "Fuck you. I quit. Strong message to follow."

Joe Smith is on his death bed, knows the end is near. His nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are with him. So, he says to them: 

"Bernie, I want you to take the Avenue Road houses."

"Sybil, take the apartments over in Rosedale."

"Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the City Center Mall."

"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the banks of the Don Valley Ravine." 

The nurse is just blown away by all this , and as Joe slips away, she says, "Mrs. Smith, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property." 

Sarah replies, "Property? .... the asshole had a paper route!" 

I hear that Motorola just proposed to buy out Enron today, and they're going to name it... Moron!