Carrier Marines

Q: Why does the Navy have Marines on aircraft carriers?
A: Sheep are too obvious.

Change

The buzzword of this election is "CHANGE." Candidates toss it around without saying what they want to change to. Just that we need CHANGE! This brings to mind the following illustration...
Years ago, there was an old tale in the Marine Corps about a lieutenant who inspected his Marines and told the "Gunny" that they smelled bad. The lieutenant suggested that they change their underwear. The "Gunny" responded, "Aye, aye, sir. I'll see to it immediately." He went into the tent and said, "The lieutenant thinks you guys smell bad, and he wants you to change your underwear. Smith, you change with Jones, McCarthy, you change with Witkowskie, Brown, you change with Schultz..." "Change, now get on with it!"
And the moral is: A candidate may promise change in Washington... but the stink remains!

Marines

Q: What does M.A.R.I.N.E.S. stand for?
A: Morons And Retards In Need of Extra Supervision