The Shamrock Chuckle Joke Contest

You must be from Ireland ... because my baloney pony is Dublin every time I think about you!

Q: Why did Daft Punk spend the night with a Leprechaun?

A: He was "Up all night to get lucky"

I went out drinking on St. Patrick's Day, so I took a bus home. That may not be a big deal to you, but I've never driven a bus before. 

Little Patrick asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, so she said yes.

When he went to wipe his bum there was no toilet paper so he used his hands.

When he got back to class his teacher asked, "What do you have in your hand?"

Patrick said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get scared away."

He was then sent to the principals office and the principal asked him, "What do you have in your hand?"

So little Patrick said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away."

He was sent home and his mom asked him "What do you have in your hand?"

So little Patrick said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away."

He was sent to his room and his dad came in and asked, "What do you have in your hand?"

So again little Patrick said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away."

Then his Dad got really mad and yelled, "Open your hands!"

And little Patrick opened his hands and said, "Look Dad you scared the shit out of him!"

Q: Why do you wear green on St. Patrick's Day?

A: So you can have lucky pants.