Profession Jokes - Dentist Jokes
Your Dentist Is Crazy
The Top 10 Signs Your Dentist Is Crazy
- Keeps trying to sell you extra teeth.
- His restrooms are labeled "Bleeders" and "Non-Bleeders"
- Pumps gas into the waiting room in advance.
- Does an extensive search for cavities...dental and body.
- He licks his tools clean.
- Gets mad when you mention that 4 out of 5 dentists surveyed lie.
- When you come to from being under the gas, he's quick to insist that you wore your pants backwards when you came into his office.
- Wears a necklace made of human teeth.
- Has a grindstone in the office for his tools.
- Insists that a Novacaine shot is something that he'll buy you at a bar if you just go out with him.
Q: What do you call a depressed dentist?
A: A little down in the mouth.
The Greatest Pain of My Life
One day, a man walked into the dentist's office for some dental work. The dentist said, "Sir, you have a tooth I must pull, What type of pain killer would you like?" The man looked at the dentist and said, "None, thanks, I have experienced the second greatest pain in my life." The dentist said, "Sir, pulling this tooth will be painful, I suggest a painkiller." The man looked back at the dentist and said, "I have experienced the second greatest pain in my life, Nothing else will ever compare." The dentist said, "Sir, I"m telling you, use a painkiller." The man again said to the dentist, "I have experienced the second greatest pain in my life, I do not need painkillers, now pull the tooth." The dentist then said, "Okay, You asked for it, But first, tell me what was the second greatest pain in your life?" The man said, "Yes, I remember it well. I was hunting in some woods north of here one snowy day. Walking through the woods, the urge came upon me and I headed over to a tree. Well, I started to do my thing, and when the first part dropped, It set off a large bear trap that was hidden in the snow that closed on my balls. That was the second greatest pain in my life" The dentist then said, "Ouch! But then what was the first greatest pain in your life?" The man replied, "When I reached the end of the chain."
The $100 Tooth
Patient: How much to have this tooth pulled?
Patient: $100.00 for just a few minutes work?
Dentist: Well, I can extract it very slowly if you like.
I recently attended a meeting of the International Singles Club here in Silicon Valley. I met a Chinese woman who was a dentist. She had perfect teeth, which started me thinking: All dentists from all cultures apparently have perfect teeth. So, I am looking for a gynecologist for my next girlfriend!