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The best jokes and joke writers!

Charged by the Police

Two guys were walking along a road in Georgia when they were struck by a police car driven by a drunken cop. One guy was thrown through the windshield and his buddy was knocked down an embankment. The first guy was charged with breaking and entering and the second with leaving the scene of an accident. 

Georgia Crazy Law

  • Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.
  • Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • Signs are required to be written in English.
  • You have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by "fighting" words.
  • No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.
  • It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.
  • Acworth - All citizens must own a rake.
  • Atlanta - Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
  • One man may not be on another man's back.
  • Columbus - Can't cut off a chicken's head on Sunday.
  • It is illegal to carry a chicken by it's feet down Broadway on Sunday.
  • Gainesville - Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
  • Jonesboro - It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy"
  • Kennesaw - Every head of household must possess a firearm of some kind.
  • Marietta - Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.
  • St. Mary's - No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.
  • Quitman - Cars are not to drive on sidewalks.
  • It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road. 

Georgia Math

The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.

He called her into his office and said, "Y'all graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everthang but my earrings. "

Red Is UG's Color

Q: Why is "red" the color of the University of Georgia?

A: Because they can't spell "crimson" or "scarlet".

Funny Thought - Cousins

I hate when people go around calling their cousins, cousin. But, I guess if you're from the South, that's a handy tool in finding a husband or wife.