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The best jokes and joke writers!

Sunday School

The Priest started his Sunday school class with a question, “Who knows what a Resurrection is?”

Without missing a beat a young boy says, “If you have one lasting more than 4 hours call your doctor.”      

Dentist Rx

A man goes to a female dentist to have a tooth extracted. She pulls out a large syringe to give him an anesthesia shot. "No way, no needles! I hate needles!" the man exclaims. So she starts to hook up the nitrous oxide tank and the man says, "I can't do the gas thing either. Just the thought of having a mask on my face suffocates me." The dentist then asks the patient if he had any objections to taking a pill. "No," he says, "I'm fine with pills." So the lady dentist gives him two little blue pills and he swallows them. "What did I just take," he asked. "Viagra," replied the dentist. "I'll be damed," said the man. "I didn't know Viagra works as a pain killer." "It doesn't, said the wise lady, "But it'll give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth."

Jay Leno Jokes!

Jay Leno Jokes from the Tonight Show...

  • Pharmaceutical companies that make birth control pills are telling teenage girls that taking the pill can help clear up their skin. Do you think that's true? I think there is a better chance of clearing up the boyfriend's skin.
  • Fashion experts say that President Bush is helping bring back cowboy boots and cowboy hats. See, so it is not just for male strippers anymore.
  • LeAnn Rimes apologized to fans for the quality of her new album. Isn't that unbelievable? If LeAnn Rimes has to apologize for her album, what the heck is Kathie Lee going to do, commit suicide?
  • In an interview with Vanity Fair magazine, Hugh Hefner admitted having 7 girlfriends, one for each night of the week... Someone should tell him those are called nurses. He said they all have sex together in the same bed. He said Viagra makes it possible, I think money makes it possible!
  • Surgeons in Britain amputated the hand of the world's first hand transplant patient because the guy requested it, after his body rejected it. How depressing is that? It's bad enough getting rejected by women, but guys, when your own hand turns you down?
  • According to a new government report, the military is running out of bullets. We are running out of ammunition! Oh good, let's tell our enemies. That's what I love about our country, you can't tell your sexual preference in the Navy, but you can tell our enemies we're running out of ammunition. "We don't have any bullets, and I can't tell you if I'm gay."

Female Viagra

Q: What is the female Viagra?

A: Jewelry.

Nursing Home Tricks

A man goes to the nursing home to visit his 84-year-old father. While there he notices the nurse give his father hot chocolate and Viagra. The man asks, "Why are you doing that? I mean, at his age what will it do for him?" The nurse explains, "The hot chocolate will help him sleep." The man asks, "And the Viagra?" "Keeps him from falling out of bed."