Lord Please Send Food
A Christian and an atheist were neighbors. The Christian one day yells, ''Lord please send me food." The atheist heard this and replies ''There is no GOD!'' The next day the Christian wakes up and goes to her porch to find that there were bags of groceries. She yells, ''Thank You LORD for this food!" As soon as soon as the Christian said that the atheist jumps out from the brush and replies, ''Your GOD didn't give you that food, I did!'' Without wasting a second the Christian yells to the Lord ''Thank you for sending me this food and making the Satan pay for it!"
- Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
- I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
- He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
- She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
- You have the right to remain silent.... Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
- I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
- Honk if you love peace and quiet.
- Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
- A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Atheism is a non-prophet organization.