China, Russia, and Poland venture to space. China says they'll go to Pluto because it's the farthest. Russia says they'll go to Jupiter because it's the biggest. Poland says they'll go to the Sun. Russia and China warn that they'll melt. They reply, "We'll go at night."
Q: How does an astronomer cut his hair?
A: Eclipse it.
More Hilarious Al Gore Quotes and Blunders
- "I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat."
- "A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
- "Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it."
- "Democrats understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
- "Welcome to President Clinton, Mrs. Clinton, and my fellow astronauts."
- "Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
- "What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
- "People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have tremendous impact on history."
- "When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in L.A., my answer has been direct and simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame."
- "The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Al Gore may or may not make."
OLD PLANETS never die, they just lose their attraction
Yo Mama - Universe Hopscotch
Yo' Mama is so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars...