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The best jokes and joke writers!

West Virginia Motto

Q: What's West Virginia's new State motto?
A: One Big Happy Family

Horse Play

An unconscious man arrives at a hospital. After a series of x-rays, the radiologist discovered the man had several plastic horses in his anus.

The doctors have declared his condition as "stable".

Ooh La La

A couple is having an intimate dinner at Marea, New York's best Italian restaurant. Their server, standing a few tables away, watches as the guy slides all the way down his chair and out of sight. The woman across from him seems to not notice. The server comes over and says, "Excuse me, Ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table." The woman says, "No he didn't, he just walked in the door."

Barber Shop

A dad was taking his daughter with him to the barbers and she asked what she was going to do while they were there. Her dad stopped and got her a bug juice and a Twinkie to keep her busy. When it was time for the dad to receive his hair cut his daughter followed along and stood by her dad. The barber told the little girl to go sit down because she might get hair on her twinkie. The little girl responded, "I know, and I'm going to get boobs too"

Robo Black

Q: What do robots and black fathers have in common?

A: Nuts and Bolts.

Shagging Twins

My friend told me he was shagging his girlfriend's twin.

I said: "You lucky thing! But how do you tell them apart?"

"Oh that's easy," he said, "Her brother has a mustache."