Q: Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children?
A: They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Chinese.
It's 11 O'clock...
In America the late night news used to broadcast this message: "It's 11 o'clock do you know where your children are?" In England they say "It's 11 o'clock do you know where your wife is?" In France they say "It's 11 o'clock do you know where your husband is?" In Poland they say "It's 11 o'clock do you know what time it is?"
Cross Between Puerto Rican and a Pollack
Q: What do you have when you cross a Puerto Rican and a Pollack?
A: A graffiti artist who spray paints on chain linked fences.
China, Russia, and Poland venture to space. China says they'll go to Pluto because it's the farthest. Russia says they'll go to Jupiter because it's the biggest. Poland says they'll go to the Sun. Russia and China warn that they'll melt. They reply, "We'll go at night."
Two Polish hunters, named Stosh and Thad, hired a pilot to fly them into the Canadian wilderness, where they managed to bag two big bull moose. As they were loading the plane to return, the pilot said the plane could take only the hunters, their gear, and one moose.
The hunters objected, saying, "We shot two last year, the pilot let us take them both, and he had exactly the same airplane as yours." The pilot, not wanting to be outdone by another bush pilot, reluctantly gave in and everything was loaded.
However even under full power, the little plane couldn't handle the load, and went down, crashing in the wooded wilderness. Surrounded by the moose, clothing, and sleeping bags, Stosh and Thad somehow survived the crash.
After climbing out of the wreckage, Thad asked Stosh, "Any idea where we are?" Stosh replied, "I think we're pretty close to where we crashed last year."